I Dumped Him...

Today, I broke it off with the one who's been my crutch, my addiction, for so many years. I said goodbye to Diet Coke. After having not had one for well over two weeks now, and knowing that after tomorrow I can't have one for quite a long time again, I decided to treat myself to a 12 ounce can from the vending machine today. 

Instantly, I felt guilty for having bought it. I didn't even want to open it. But as he always does, Diet Coke enticed me enough that I popped the cap open and took a sip. Something strange happened this time, though. It didn'tfill any craving or satisfy any taste. In fact, it didn't even taste the same as it used to. I tasted some syrup–like tastes that I did not really enjoy. I took one more sip, to make sure that it wasn't just me. But it wasn't. 

Diet Coke and I just were not meant to be together anymore. So I turned the can over, and poured it out. I'm not his girl anymore. It was a telling moment, letting me know that I really am ready for the surgery. But I really am committed to the changes that I need to make.

Day 5 Pre-Op: Carb Withdrawl

So today is day five of my 14-day pre-op diet. I truly thought I'd be dead or completely gone crazy by now having to give up carbs, sugar and soda all at once, but my body has been responding well, so it's helping. 

I am amazed that I don't miss the Diet Coke at all. I figured that'd be the biggest challenge, but cutting back the past month and having my body go into confusion over the denial of multiple things at once seems to have put Diet Coke Withdrawl on the back burner. I'll take it!

The biggest challenge so far has definitely been the carbs. I'm a huge carb fan. I love me some potatoes, bread and butter, rice, noodles. That's the best, but not when prepping for bariatric surgery. Right now, they're as evil as a Snickers Bar. So, how do you cope?

My biggest tools have been to, drink, drink, drink. My protein shakes have a lot of protein and that also helps tide over my hunger, but also by drinking lots, I'm feeling fuller. I bought sugar-free drink packets (my favorite being Crystal Light's Pink Lemonade) to flavor the water so it doesn't get monotonous and it's helped a lot. Finally, stay busy. The worst is when you're bored and you want to go get snacks, but you can't. Keeping busy helps keep the mind off of it.

I have to say, my family has eaten out three times and al three times I avoided the carbs. It's not been easy, but it goes to show how much I want this. Eating out on restrictions will be in another blog entry. For now, wish me some resiliency! 9 days until surgery! I can do this and so can anyone who wants a healthier life.

The Pre-Op Diet

Today I begin my pre-op diet, which is to be primarily carb and sugar free, and substituting a high protein shake for two meals. The hardest part is definitely going to be not grazing. I'm a snacker, so I keep looking around for a snack but I purposefully didn't bring any. I know this will get a lot easier once I get all the sugars out of my system, but it's definitely going to be a challenge.

I talked about my surgery with my dad last night and was pleasantly surprised with how interested and supportive he was about it! He was asking all sorts of questions and kept professing how proud he was of me for making such a bold move to get my health back in control and how happy he was for me, knowing that I was going to feel like a whole new person six months from now. He knew Bariatrics wasn't the easy way out but talked about how much faith he had in me. I definitely didn't expect it, but was happy to have the encouragement the night before my pre-op diet started.

So, today will be interesting. HW is 254.4. CW is 251.8. I'll probably be ravenous by dinner time, but oh will I be happy to see that broccoli!

Dream Vacation

If I lose 100 pounds, I want to go to Jamaica.

Save the Date!

So, I got my date!!! I'm super stoked. They called on February 6th and asked if I could do it on the 25th, with my pre-op classes and such on the 20th. Totally threw me off, since I didn't think they were going to be able to get me in until April. Unfortunately, as I'm currently training for my new job, I had a mandatory training day on the 20th. She had another slot open for surgery on March 4th, though, so I took that one. It is probably for the best, though, as I would have had to start my pre-op diet almost immediately and I didn't have all the stuff for the protein shakes, etc. yet. I was able to go online over the past few days and get the stuff ordered.

Supplies have begun to arrive, and it's exciting as they come. As many know, protein shakes end up being a big part of your life during Bariatrics, so having the right products can make a world of difference. We are allowed to buy Whey Protein or Whey Isolate, but since Isolate is absorbed easier by the body, I went with that. Torani Brand has a huge line of Sugar Free syrups that can help keep you from getting bored with the standard chocolate and vanilla you're otherwise stuck with. And while I've also heard good thing about the vitamin brand Bariatrics Advantage, I chose to go with doctor-approved Celebrate Vitamins which taste as good as the others and cost less.

25 days to go!

APPROVED!

Well, it's now February 1st! I called the insurance company the other day to find out if my doctor had requested authorization for the surgery yet, and much to my excitement, I found out that not only had they requested authorization, but that I was APPROVED! I almost couldn't contain my excitement. I wanted to tell the whole world, but I knew there was still waiting to be done.

At this point, once the doctor receives hard-copy proof of the approval (the insurance company sends it to them), then they will send it over to the hospital scheduling department. I am anxiously awaiting their call.

Having just started a new job last week (yay me!), I was told that the company would be issuing us five shirts. We had to pick which colors we wanted and list our size. Of course, to rub it in, it was my luck that the shirts supposedly run a little small, so I had to order 3X's. I told the secretary, in confidence, that I was going to be having the surgery soon and she said not to worry, that I would be able to trade the shirts in as I shrink.

It was actually nice because mentioning it to her made her open up about how she wants to explore bariatrics for herself and her 340 lb. husband. I told her of all the amazing success stories I keep hearing of, and how everyone consistently appears nothing but completely apprehensive before the surgery, but then raves about how it saved their life and it was the best decision they ever made after the surgery. It was yet another reminder of how the stigma of this much-needed disease treatment is keeping people sick and ill.

My husband and I took some 'Before' shots this past couple of weeks. They were pretty much humiliating, but I am proud of myself for having taken action and am feeling secure knowing that I will be getting rid of this painful disease soon, with the help of amazing surgeons and some hard work on my part, couple with the loving support of my family.

A friend recently showed me this photo and it's provided more inspiration than anything I have seen so far. So, I will leave you with this and look forward to talking to you all more soon!